Partner in Paradise

My heart has a habit of illuminating certain souls that radiate like the sun and enrapture me with their glow. Stolen glances ensue while I steady the euphoria within, maintaining a stoic facade for the intellectual evaluation to begin. My mind longs to know you and cleave your thoughts asunder, but how to achieve this without looking desperate I wonder? The role of passive spectator conflicts greatly with my nature, for this world is too short to roam like an impartial creature. If my heart feels for you I will surely make it known, just look to my eyes, this is where my affection is shown.

For I am a heart that beats,
a tongue that speaks,
a body that bleeds,
and a soul that seeks.

But these eyes also uncover truth when intentions are concealed, and sheds tears in isolation when affection is repealed. And though my tongue is not sharp with seeds of contempt, or my actions reflective of internal discontent, my gradual absence from your life and attempts to circumvent are the subtle signs of my heartache and efforts to forgot.

But life goes on and scars heal.

So I pray for a companion that will love and sacrifice, and who by God’s grace is my partner in paradise.

Empty Spaces

I began a complex puzzle the day that I was born,
The macro image unraveling as the years went on.
Personal triumphs and successes revealing segments of the whole,
While challenges and obstacles waged a war on my soul.
Fragments emerged over time that ultimately did not fit,
Yet my heart clung to the possibility, the menacing “what if”.
Empty spaces cannot be filled with things that are innately hollow,
We must take a breath, soldier on, and bear the pain of letting go.
Like a nomad in the desert searching for an oasis,
I too sought refuge in unfamiliar places.
Pieces of my identity scattered across time and space,
A journey towards self-discovery that can never be replaced.
Life is an unpredictable sequence of highs and lows,
Our reaction to these phases determines how it goes.
Carry on I must, until my puzzle becomes clear,
Completed by those final pieces, I continue to hold dear.

Heaven

I ascend above the highest clouds into heaven;

Where faith is a soaring eagle and ignorance is its descension;

Where life is everlasting and comforts are endless;

Where the state of our souls reflects our physical presence;

Where the content of character is the only essential credential;

Where love is perfectly paired like two turtle doves;

Unbound to the restrictions of finite mortal love;

No time or space, no kings or slaves,

Only eternal peace for all those He forgave.

But then I awake, blood still surging through my veins;

Sleeps beautiful ecstasy no longer in range;

The struggle continues, though my soul remains restless;

To return to this paradise on God’s personal guest list.

Friendship

Deliverance from the confines of the casual.
Freedom from clusters compounded by convenience.
Emancipation from reactions like robotic code.
Linear liberation into an exponential abode.
Synchronized soulmates meant for immortality.
Illuminated hearts amidst shadowy normality.
Mutual love lingering from stories untold.
A physical manifestation making a half a whole.

Eternal Bliss

I dream of perpetual, eternal bliss,
Of sincere smiles, and true love’s kiss,
Where eyes glisten like stars in the never ending abyss,
I dream of perpetual, eternal bliss.

Longing for fond memories reemerging into existence,
Reminding our hearts of the fallacy of distance,
Reflecting on heaven and the seat reserved for our souls,
Accompanied by halves who make our hearts whole.

Alas, glimmers of paradise do exist in this time,
Visible to those whose faith and life align,
Their minds affixed to the universe’s endless possibilities,
Their hearts appeased with Earth’s beautiful subtleties.

I dream of perpetual, eternal bliss,
Of sincere smiles, and true love’s kiss,
Aware of the plan much better than mine,
Where my heart is consumed in space and beyond time.

Unveiled

Darkness dissipates at day break,
Unveiling the reality of the eve.
Rays radiant from beating hearts,
Awakened by a most difficult parting.
Unrequited feelings exist as mortal enemies of ease,
But with expressed truth there lies an all encompassing peace.
With time do all wounds heal, so is the way of things,
Hopes of a cherished friendship to remain, and the overwhelming joy it brings.

Metamorphosis

I struggle to be present.
To give all of me in every moment, completely exposed,
Bottled up emotions ready to implode,
Censored speech and actions, concerned with repercussions,
Lost in my life, a drop in an ocean.

Not sure who I am, and what is it that I love,
Often forgetting my soul, and my Lord up above,
Yearning to break free from the shackles of fear,
Always myself, not just with those I hold dear.

Like a child in a womb, embraced by its mother,
I long to find the me inside myself,
To live each moment as though it was my last,
To pray for my future, and learn from my past.

So I struggle.
Fighting the resistance controlling my head,
Searching for me amongst the chaos instead,
Finding solace in God, the One who knows me best,
To be present. That is my test.

Fleeting

Staring at the horizon where the waves touch the sky,
Where the infinite feels intimate as the sails drift on by.
In the silence ring the echoes of feelings finally fading,
Realizing that life is change, not stationary contemplating.
Locked eyes now able to observe the periphery,
Affixing the fleeting focus in the scheme of things.
Enthralled by the grandeur of the existence now made clear,
While wishfully waiting for a new centerpiece to appear.

Half of a Whole

You make my day a little brighter, my spirit a little stronger,
my burden a little lighter.
Your words penetrate like an arrow never missing its target,
perfection.
Your eyes pierce through my brick fortified facade,
reaching the core, past the external mirage.
You are the subject of my dreams, and the hope for my reality.
My heart longs for your heart to feel complete again,
Though my brain is aware that you don’t feel the same.
But hope clings to my soul like roots in a storm,
Never breaking free from the thought of love foregone.
Two opposing pawns on a chessboard, unable to collide,
One hoping for the other to close the divide.
With each sunrise, I awake to thoughts of you,
And pray that one day you’ll feel them too.
But life goes on in the wake of despair,
We must pick up our armor and learn to prepare.
Ready ourselves for the breaking of the dawn,
Bringing new life and new dreams for this pawn.
I will keep you in my heart and pray that you are blessed,
But will live my life until my last breath.